Distant birthday wishes for a good ol’ gal

Today is Phoebe’s 29th birthday, but 2000 miles keeps her and her close friend Helen from celebrating together.

“It is hard to not be near loved ones when happy occasions are being celebrated,” laments Helen, who has known Phoebe for over 20 years, dating back to their early grade school days.

Discussing the origins of their friendship, Helen says, “We met in kindergarten. We used to walk to school together occasionally and when we got older I would help her with her paper route after school. I remember Phoebe always had her hair in beautiful braids and that she always wore a dress to school on picture day.”

Helen says that when she reflects on the fond memories of their childhood, adolescence and adulthood together, they make her smile.

“We have a weird and wonderful past together; many memories that others may not find as funny as we do, but that is what makes the memories even sweeter,” says Helen. “I was with her when she was shot in the butt cheek with a BB gun while jumping on a trampoline. She was riding the horse that peed on me while I lay on a paved road in pain after falling off my horse.

“I still remember the look on her face when she hobbled into the restaurant I worked at and told me she had put her foot through a hay elevator gear, I laughed at her and she forgave me. We were together for our first dates, first loves, first cars, first broken hearts, true love, wedding days, and when my Dorothy was born.”

Helen notes that she and Phoebe have a strong connection. “She is one of the few people that really ‘get’ me,” says Helen. “She can tell what mood I’m in simply by looking at me, and I can tell the same about her. We have had our fair share of good times and bad, but for some unknown reason we have been able to stay close. We don’t get to talk that often since we live in different states, but when we do talk, it is like we chatted only yesterday. It is just natural to start where we left off and continue with our conversation.”

Like most good friendships, Helen says that their friendship has continued despite many changes in each of their lives.

“We're both grown-ups now. We're both married to wonderful men and have kids to take care of,” Helen says. “Sometime’s we joke about how funny it is that we are considered grown-ups. We both feel like we did ten years ago when we left high school; like we still have a whole life ahead of us that is full of unknowns.”

When questioned about why she has remained close to Phoebe, Helen said, “She is one of those people that you can’t help but like. She is a genuinely positive person and always has a warm smile on her face. She would give you the shirt off her back if you asked.”

Helen quickly added, “But if you mess with her, she will rip you to shreds. That’s one of her best qualities.”

According to Helen, these traits are what have kept Phoebe and Helen’s friendship interesting throughout the years. “I have finally come to the conclusion that she is unique in my life,” says Helen. “There is just no other Phoebe out there. I miss her every day and I hope that she knows how grateful I am for her friendship throughout my life. She’s just a good ol’ gal and I love her for it.”

It’s that time of year again

Throughout the country football fans are ecstatic about the start of another football season, but their spouses don’t necessarily share in the excitement.

“It’s hard for me when football season comes around,” says Helen, whose husband Bob is an avid football fan. “The games are really long and they are on every single weekend and at least two days during the week. I feel like all we do is watch football.”

Helen admits her bias toward the game may stem from the environment she was raised in.

“We didn’t watch football when I was growing up. I remember watching basketball games with my dad, but not football games. We would only watch football on Thanksgiving when my aunt and uncle were around. Then I met Bob and here I am, watching football three to four nights a week,” she said.

Helen claims watching football with her husband has helped her to gain a better appreciation for the game.

“I don’t think we should spend so much time watching the games, but I have to admit that I enjoy watching them with Bob,” she said. “He told me he enjoys watching the games with me too because I am able to ‘talk intelligently’ about the game now that I understand it better.”

Watching football has become a weekend routine for Helen and Bob’s little family.

“My two oldest children have teams that they like to cheer for,” she says, “Dorothy is a Redskins fan and Buzz is a Cowboys fan. It is funny to watch them harass each other about the teams they like, they get that from Bob who is also a Cowboys fan. I don’t have a favorite team but I do have certain players that I enjoy watching.”

Helen recognizes there are worse things her husband could enjoy doing besides watching the Cowboys football games.

“While the games do tend to eat up a lot of our time together, I am grateful that he does his best to put our family first,” she said. “He usually only watches the games after the kids go to bed on weekdays and on weekends he helps me with whatever I need done before he turns the game on. It could be worse, he could be a BYU football fan, those people are crazy.”

Rise Up

In lieu of a post about September 11th, please take a moment to listen to Bruce Springsteen's "My City of Ruins" and reflect about this tragic moment in time and all the innocent lives lost.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zld2cSIVUO4

On this, the seventh anniversary, let us all follow Springsteen's admonition to "rise up" by making the choice to be a better person. Tell your family you love them; smile at a stranger; say a prayer to your God; and find forgiveness for those that have offended you. This day is a forceful reminder that we are all in this together. God bless America.

Voter finds hope for a better tomorrow

The American people have a tough choice to make over the next eight weeks as presidential nominees, Sen. Barack Obama (D) and Sen. John McCain (R), campaign heavily for their votes.

Both parties closed their national conventions on high notes and their supporters gained more insight into the political ideologies and personal beliefs of the candidates themselves. Each candidate asked independent voters for their support and offered their political agendas as reasons to join in their efforts.

One independent voter, Helen, said watching both conventions helped make her decision.

“I have listened to what both sides have to say and I feel like I have a good understanding of why voters would vote for either,” says Helen. “I understand the draw to McCain, he is an American hero and I believe he would be a fine president. I have no doubt that he loves his country, that he is a respectable man and probably a really nice guy. I’m not sold on Palin, no one really knows anything about her and I have a problem with that. But, my heart is with the Obama-Biden ticket.”

Though raised in a predominantly republican state, Helen says she struggles with some of the republican agenda.

“I strongly oppose abortion, but also strongly oppose a government that tells any woman what to do with her body. I believe that marriage is between a man and a woman, but also think that homosexuals can love just as deeply as I can and that they should have the right to take care of their loved ones despite their sexual preference. I believe that there are terrorists in the world that want to destroy my beautiful country and am extremely disappointed that the pursuit of the extremist who actually has attacked our country was put on the back-burner so that a cowboy from Texas could flex his muscles by invading a completely unrelated country. And I am terrified of being alone as a country in this big world thanks to the many international ties that have been broken by our current administration,” she said.

Helen concedes her choice is not solely based on political party agendas.

“I have always felt cheated that I wasn’t alive when John F. Kennedy and Martin Luther King Jr. were here. When I read or listen to their speeches today, I am moved to tears and hope fills my heart. They were able to rally the masses simply through their words,” she says. “My husband, Bob, and I have talked on several occasions about how great it would be to have a president that could inspire people when they spoke. And then came along Barack Obama. He understands my struggles and what my heart’s desires are for my family. He gives me hope. He inspires me to be a better citizen in my community, a better neighbor and a better person. He can rally the masses and shake the world.”

During the republican national convention numerous remarks were made by all the major party figures about Obama’s public speaking ability. Republican leaders insist that “actions speak louder than words” and that Obama cannot change the problems in this country by simply speaking about them. Helen disapproves of such attacks.

“They openly mocked me, a voter, for finding hope in his words,” says Helen, “He is not the first, and, hopefully, he will not be the last great leader that has the ability to rally the masses with his words. Even if, in the end, nothing gets fixed and everything is still in shambles, I am able to believe for the first time in my adult life that there is hope for a better tomorrow and that change can really happen.”